Saturday, June 16, 2007

On Visiting a Very Sick Friend

Today I went to see a friend in the hospital -- one of my church members. Early this morning I prayed with him and his family before he underwent "routine" bypass surgery. I told him I probably wouldn't see him after surgery because he'd be too tired to know or care that I'd been there. Instead, I'd see him in the morning. Well, I DID see him again tonight because he had a brush with death, though he appeared to be stable when I left, late into the night.

I've known my friend for over 20 years. The hard part about that, of course, is realizing how close he came to dying. When I came to our church nearly 29 years ago, I had funerals for my members. Now, I only have funerals for my friends! Every funeral involves my family. And that's hard. It's wonderfully rewarding to be able to support a family I have known for 20 or 25 years, but it's hard. It's part of the suffering of the ministry.

This week I was talking with someone in town who said a former pastor had told people that pastors shouldn't stay with a church longer than 10 years. I suppose that's fine for him. It will protect him from the kind of pain I suffer each time I bury one of my long time friends. But it will also shield him from the joy I experienced last week when I married two young people who had grown up in our church, been nurtured in our youth group, gone off to college, and returned to be married here. How cool is that!

Ten-year pastorates don't hurt as much, but they don't give as much either!